Gay terms for guys

When it comes to expressing their identities, gay men have their own vibrant and evolving lexicon. From playful terms of endearment to empowering phrases, the world of gay slang is as diverse as the community itself.

It may also at times be used as an umbrella term to refer to a wider portion of the LGBTQ+ community.

Gray aromantic/Gray asexual: feeling romantic or sexual attraction only occasionally, not very strongly, or only after certain conditions have been met, or feeling somewhere in-between aromantic and alloromantic or asexual and allosexual.

Also can include a desire to be in a relationship with someone that is “soft-romo,” low on romance, or that is otherwise somewhere between platonic and romantic.

Aromantic (Aro): not experiencing romantic attraction. For example, if your husband had a boyfriend, who you were not also dating, your husband’s boyfriend would be your metamour.

Monogamy: a relationship style characterized by commitment to a single intimate partner.

Polyaffectionate: having or wanting a non-romantic intimate relationship with more than one person at once, a word for a relationship style based on the word “polyamorous” and frequently used by aromantics, as well as others who desire or participate in having multiple intimate but non-romantic partners.

Polyamory: a relationship style characterized by a preference for or practice of having multiple intimate partners, where all participants know about and consent to having multiple partners.

Generally used in a medical context, but also sometimes as an identity term in the transmasculine community.

FTX: an acronym that stands for “female to X,” describes a transgender person who was assigned female at birth but now identifies as, has transitioned, or is transitioning towards a neutral or androgynous gender or sex.

Mother Superior (n.) – older and wiser gay male who has been around the block a few times; similar to “auntie,” but more favorable.

29. Nine-dollar bill (n.) – extremely outward homosexual, one three-times more flaming than someone who is “queerer than a three-dollar bill.”

30. Nonbinary is sometimes shortened to NB (or “enby,” a phonetic pronunciation of the letters N-B).

Some people will also add the word “nonbinary” to a more binary gender label to indicate that they experience masculinity or femininity, but in a way that is distinct from binary gender.

It can also refer to someone who is financially stable and provides for their partner.

• For instance, someone might say, “He’s my daddy, he takes care of me and spoils me.”
• In a conversation about age gaps in relationships, a person might say, “I prefer dating daddies, they have more life experience.”
• A gay man might refer to himself as a daddy and say, “I embrace my daddy role, it’s part of who I am.”

5.

Ring snatcher (n.) – during sex, the person who performs the bottom role. This includes both binary trans men and some nonbinary people.

Transneutral: a transgender person who identifies with, is transitioning towards, or has transitioned to a neutral gender identity or gender expression.

Two-spirit: a pan-Indian umbrella term used by some Indigenous North Americans to describe a wide variety of traditional gender-nonconforming, LGBTQ+, and third-gender and fourth-gender social and spiritual roles within Native American and First Nations cultures, distinct from man or woman.

While many also identify as transgender, not all non-binary people do

Pansexual – Attraction toward people of all genders, including those who identify as transgender, transsexual, androgynous, genderqueer, agender, and all other gender identifications, as well as those who do not feel they have a gender; pansexuality is often confused or intermeshed in definition with bisexuality.

Polyamory – The state of having multiple sexually or romantically committed relationships at the same time, with the consent of all partners involved.

May be used specifically to refer to gay men, or more generally as an umbrella term to talk about anyone who is attracted to people of their same gender, including lesbians and some people attracted to multiple genders, such as bisexuals or pansexuals. It’s best not to use it to refer to anyone who doesn’t want the word applied to them or who feels that it doesn’t express their experiences, but it’s also best not to censor the word or ask those who identify as queer to stop using it.

Romantic attraction: a pull or desire to do romantic activities with a particular person.

A term used by some members of the Black community to express same-sex/gender attractions. This is distinct from the experience of feeling romantic or sexual attraction but choosing not to pursue a relationship until after such a bond has been formed.

Gay: experiencing attraction to people of one’s own gender.

For example, a person might identify as both aromantic and bisexual, or heteroromantic and demisexual.

Straight: attracted to a gender different from one’s own, generally refers to women who are attracted exclusively to men and men who are attracted exclusively to women.

WLW: an acronym that stands for “women loving women.” Refers to women who are attracted to women, whether or not they are attracted exclusively to other women.